Punarnavaa2008

They met in "Punarnavaa2008", the cultural fest of her college. Deepesh had no idea that when would the unknown quest of his life end, but it did. Diya was wearing a white kurti, blue jeans and her favorite sneakers, and was freaking in campus when both of them saw and immediately recognized each other. he stood up at his place as if wanted to welcome and embrace her, she too parted from her friends as if wanted to be escorted by him to her dream palace. They were classmates till 9th, and then Deepesh went Mumbai because of the transfer of his father.
Diya: hey, hi, although its dumb to say that you have changed a lot in last 7 years but I say. :)
Deepesh: yes, and you grew up beautifully, yet you successfully maintained the divine and decent radiation of your serious face. :) and then he himself could not know what drove him and he asked her- "will you be my Girlfriend"
She was stunned at his audacity and wild courage,and because he did not seem to be joking or kidding, she was taken aback. He looked serious and so was he.
She wanted to slap him on one cheek and on another she wanted to kiss him. finally she laughed and said- "Oh very yes, I was waiting you since long ,my prince charming, where have you been" winked her eyes in order to tell him that he also should wink his, since its a long minute he did not. further she smiled and said- let us talk to know each other more.
How Deepesh managed to smile only(he wanted to laugh) its difficult to say, as he knew she was a bit afraid of his sudden proposal and was impressed with her answer.
but he was different that moment onwards.
Diya definitely was not that beautiful so that one can not move his eyes away from her face, but for him her smile was the best in the world, her complexion was the best to color decency, dignity and strength of character, her myopic eyes were exactly complimentary while communicating his own myopic eyes.
he felt lost in her voice and was feeling like heavens. On the other hand Diya was perplexed, was feeling guilty for nothing she had done.

She said "let us walk to cafeteria and let me treat you". Meanwhile they kept talking, Deepesh told her that now he was in Bangalore, his branch was IT (Diya's was CSE). His elder sister's marriage is after two months, and he studied 9th and 10th in Mumbai and then went to south and did his 11 and 12th there. His C.P.I was 7.5, and he earned his pocket money on his own, No campus placement yet and no Girlfriend as well. He has been aloof to the world since he moved from Delhi. He told that he lives with family, and was not happy,He did not like his father as he stresses him too much for studies although he topped in class 10th boards, His mother and sister keep finding faults in him, once he tried to run away from home, but he returned home after a day, and since then he was just another person in this big world. More rejection made him more aloof, he was busy and lonely in his own world. Yes, He had friends but everyone enjoyed his treats and study-notes, No one was interested in Him.
Diya kept listening with the dexterity of a psychologist and acceptance of a mother, Neither he was nervous, nor aloof anymore. He wanted her to know each and everything. He told that he started smoking when he was in class 12th,but then left it, suffered from long maladies, appendix and jaundice, malaria...... etc etc.

and then they were near cafeteria when he said..."sorry Diya, for what I asked you". Now both of them were quite easy with each other. she smiled and then they laughed together, He kept looking at her face whenever she was not looking at him.

They ordered for sandwich and fruit juice, then Diya told about her life, and each and every word of her was impressing him more than he was expecting, she told almost everything. and as soon as she said ..."Neither campus placement,nor a Boyfriend yet" both of them laughed.

The three days of fest were the best days of their life, Deepesh spoke his heart out, Diya kept correcting him logically as well as spiritually, after three days he was completely healed, He did not have a bad thing for his parents anymore, He learnt to accept and confess in last three days. Being loved and needed was the best experience of his life, Now he felt the world more welcoming, more offering and more loving.
when they parted on third day Diya's face was brightening with satisfaction and Deepesh's was with joy and reception, He was no more afraid of rejection. They finally bade good bye.

To all the readers..

Hi friends
Thanks for ur mails and responses.
Its quite interesting that most of you asked me the same question... :)
That "are these my thoughts only or are they related to my personal life"

So..
These stories and poems are definitely related to my thoughts but not personal life's experience.

All of them are fantasies, specially this monster's lover and the girl's confession.

yes the first line may be quite illusive, but that can be forgiven as my desire of playing heroine (just in case you visualize the description as me :P )


Love to you all!!

Keep enjoying!!

Sh@lini
19 October 2008.

A monster's lover

She was intelligent, calm, mature, tall, golden brown, not much beautiful yet presentable.

He too was tall, handsome and intelligent.

One quality that one never could avoid noticing about,  was her way of talking, referring, usage of myopic eyes while talking, expressive and toned voice. Amazingly the same thing either people liked most or hated (envied) most about her. 

He was a case of confusion. He never could identify whether he loved it or hated.

Repulsion stirred the restlessness which in turn led to attraction.

Attraction of unknown, unknowable, yet both of them dived into the feelings, quite hopeful to be hopeless at last.

In the span of year all the thoughts expanded and contracted, it took exactly one year for girl to derive a conclusion about the boy, as at the last of one year the boy could not help himself showing glimpses of his ugly facet.

Both of them resented the intelligence of each other.

Repulsive outwardly, both of them wanted to reconcile.

Dangled in the thoughts of each other they longed for their buddy. But who will say this!!

"All men are the same" and "It’s difficult to understand a woman"

To each other they became the medium to prove the above sayings right.

To the girl HE was like ‘knowing all men’, and the boy attempted making that girl understandable.

Because both of them were intelligent, logical and argumentative It lead to long discussions, which deliberately converted into altercations, because both of them had high sense of pride, It happened many a times that they stopped talking.

But’ repulsion causes attraction’ and they reconciled again.  To them It was simply impossible to resist each other.
And this process continued a year.

So this was how they went mentally.

Physically both looked as if made for each other. Not a heroic pair they were, yet good enough. They definitely would have wanted each other given such privileges.

Now let us talk their metaphysical chemistry.

Yes, right! This was the actual source of attraction; repulsion was about 'not to accept the attraction'.

Both of them wanted/needed an alter ego.

Both of them were not only alone, but also Lonely at certain level.

They yearned for a selfless lover and were ready to be one.

Frustrated for they yet could not found any, Shy to admit that they are seeing the great possibilities in each other.

The girl was patient by nature while the boy was reactive at rejection.

The girl had her own tastes and preferences, the boy wanted to fulfill them but she thought that she would have to grovel her pride lower to her self respect. (The innocent and fearful side of the girl)

One phone call was sufficient to end all the thoughts cultivated in span of 1 year. But Its enough you see…………… 1 year!! Damn One Year!!

Her phone rang, and after their last altercation four months back, the simple broaching of a relationship, and he spoiled everything.

All men are the same!! The girl thought hopelessly, innocently in terms of true love.

And Its really difficult to understand a girl, the boy realized this after  she denied to recognize his voice and the frustration of boy heightened, which made him say that He was her old lover.

Just a real move to the truth but this was where the boy started loosing all the things remained. The heart which was already lost, yelled on him to speak out everything gently, properly and effectively but the brain tried to control.

Neither the boy could tell the truth, nor could he cover the feelings through the voice.

 Once the girl felt her heart bouncing with joy but who knows what happened to her the next moment. May be she was afraid to move in. But the truth was she just wanted to win over him. She just wanted him to accept that he could not reject her. 

Finally with a devilish smile, the girl decided never to recognize him again.

And this was when He lost himself in the thoughts of girl.

The complete looser, A monster's lover... He really was!!

.....Sh@lini
9th October 2008

Give Back a Fight!!

Call the Life, and hold it tight,
Take your chance, give back a fight.

Draw pleasure out of pain,
Soak the moisture from rain.

Accept the offerings,
World is welcoming.

Time to wish, think, plan,
act and execute.

hug yourself and improve then,
stick to the job, till the diamond shines!!

-Shalini
2 October 2008.